Tonie Phillips, LMHC
How Comfortable Is Your Corner?
When was the last time you allowed yourself to try something new or make a friend? Quarantine aside, how often do you appreciate what life has to offer beyond your well traveled routine? How would you rate your need for fresh experiences, and are you keeping up with that need? I must admit, I wasn’t.
In my last article I wrote that I have been committed to protecting my peace since I attained it some time ago. Something about writing that line felt so good! Still, if you’ve worked with me you’d know, I’m always on the lookout for the next lesson. After the pink flags post, I considered whether I partially defined peace as an exaggerated stillness or even active avoidance of untraveled roads. I’d dropped the ball on one of my deepest truths: I attain happiness through exploration. It seemed I’d forgotten this recently and became overzealous in my wellness crusade. A blind spot was uncovered, and corrective action was necessary.
I have to be consistent in my quest to explore more of the world. More importantly, I have to reconcile that need with my tight grip on ‘peace’. A peaceful healthy life can have a wide variety of configurations. The most important thing to remember is health and wellness shouldn’t lead to confinement. I’m afraid I was entirely too rigid with my definition, and now I must make extra effort to ensure my full list of needs are met. I’m currently exploring how I can welcome new, healthy women into my friend circle. Moreover, I’m scheduling creative projects that keep the gems I’ve amassed in recent years top of mind.
For you the reader, this post is my invitation to embrace healthy exploration, adventure, new hobbies, new friends, and NEW opportunities. Resist the comfort of your corner! I’m well aware that meaningful connections may be hard to find, but that just means you must look in unexpected places. When it comes to new experiences, try everything. Even if you don’t enjoy it, at least you’ll have a fun story to share.
Say yes to that socially distanced video dance party (yes, this is a real thing. Check Twitter, it’s fun!)! Even better, throw the video dance party yourself! Join a class on calligraphy with people from San Francisco via Course Horse. Explore life with the intensity of a parent forcing their nine year old to enjoy an after school dance program. Try all of the things at least once. Quarantine has many of us living in hibernation, and it has slowed us down. Don’t allow hints of depression to convince you that being at home means withdrawing from others in the world. Many of us are stuck at home, and the clever among us have dived into connective virtual experiences.
I tend to notice trends in the lives of my clients. Judging from what I’ve seen, March - August offered a heavy duty personal development bootcamp for some of us. September can and should be a reawakening! Exercise those life lessons in the real world. Debut the new you, and manifest ‘peace’ brought about by healthy outlets of fun!
Questions For Reflection:
What can I put on hold for right now to allow something new to emerge?
What inspired action can I take to externalize my commitment to wellness? To connect to others as part of my wellness mission?
What tools and resources are currently available to me to create fresh experiences?
How can I create a healthy exchange of positive energy with others?
Has any aspect of your self improvement journey become a burden to you? Have you dishonored your needs, and if so, what is required to correct it? [Writer's Note: Be sure to practice forgiveness here, as it isn’t uncommon to overcorrect. The important thing is to make the change once an issue has become apparent.}
Am I clinging to any extreme ideas? Where can I loosen my grip?